My Worst Fears Realized

WHAT THE DEVIL?!

If you know me well, then you might (probably) know what my biggest fear is: Moths.

Yes. Creepy, furry, ugly, flying MOTHS.

It probably started when I was in middle school and we had to catch bugs for a science project. I caught crickets, spiders, beetles, ladybugs and butterflies with relative ease. My battle with the moth, however, was when my fear was really solidified. I chased that evil, flying, spawn-of-Satan for 2 hours around my room one night, begged my mother to kill it for me (who just laughed and said “it’s just a moth”), decided I just wouldn’t capture a moth for my project, realized that son-of-a-bitch was still lurking somewhere in my room, and then may or may not have cried in frustration (and fear) before finally smashing it against my wall (victory, at last!!) Afterwards, it left a moth-shaped coat of sticky fur on my wall (that I was never able to completely clean off) and I had to stick a needle through it’s thick, hairy body for my insect display. Barf.

So I never thought there could be anything worse than moths. UNTIL I came to Korea and learned about this horrible thing called a HUMMINGBIRD-HAWK-MOTH are you FREAKING kidding me?!!! THIS:

WHAT THE DEVIL?!
WHAT THE DEVIL?! Source: Wikipedia

No, I haven’t encountered one, thank you baby Jesus, and if I did, I probably wouldn’t be here to write about it since I would most likely die in fear (or maybe from that thing EATING MY FACE).

Apparently they’re common over here and I will now be spending the next 4 months in this country indoors away from these repulsive bird-moths. I just heard about them today on a Facebook thread, so naturally, I spent all of my free time at work Googling them. How big are they? Where are they from? WHAT DO THEY WANT??!

I realize that this may be an irrational fear. But how is this any different than fearing spiders? Or cockroaches? Or sharks? Granted, the latter can actually kill you or at least bite a limb off, but why is fearing moths any different than fearing other insects? There are tons of people who are scared of spiders and are always like “thank God spiders can’t fly” – well moths CAN fly! In erratic and unpredictable flight patterns! One second they’re 10 feet away, the next, they’re BEHIND YOUR EAR flittering away like it’s nobody’s business.

Upon reading about these little monsters, I have come across articles where people describe them as “beautiful” or even “adorable” and talking about how “lucky” you would be to see one. What is wrong with you people?!! These creatures can eat through CLOTHES and Oriental RUGS. When is the last time you’ve tried and succeeded at eating through wool and fur?!

Fortunately, I have also come across several blogs of others who are equally (if not more) terrified of moths. Thank you the Everywhereistfor describing my fear down to a T.

And thank you Korea, it’s been an amazing 8 months but I will now be hiding in my tiny apartment, hoping and praying that these Hummingbird Hawk Moths will never find me.

Evidence That Moths are the Spawns of Satan:

  1. They’re night-dwellers. All bad and horrible things happen at night.
  2. Light kills them (like how light kills vampires). It’s not a coincidence.
  3. Some moths (well at least the species, Calyptra thalictri and Hemiceratoides hieroglyphica) drink BLOOD and the TEARS FROM BIRDS. Enough said.

The Everwhereist‘s accurate depiction of what people THINK a moth looks like….

Moth1

versus what it REALLY looks like:

Moth2

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6 Comment

  1. Gamin says: Reply

    How it is possible? Someone else feels exactly the same way I do about moths?!?! Freaking terrifying. And none seems to understand. I have been known to irrationally scream at the sight of dead moths, so you can imagine how a live one effects me…
    As a child I grew in Maine -home to many large creepy moths due the swamp land. I think that is where it all started.

    But a decade ago I first learned about’Hawk moths when my cat began bringing live ones as ‘gifts’ my into the house.
    They dive bomb you!! They a horrible whirring sound!! Even the force of a broom cannot damage their hard exoskeleton body!!
    And the EYES! They look like giant pupils. Staring at you, hungry, haunting, soul-shaking!

    I cannot count the number of times my cat did this. Seriously, sometimes it was twice a night. He would come through door and give a muffled meow. His jaw lightly closed around the giant body, two giant wings whirring out the sides of his mouth.

    I would look at him in horror, and as I screamed “Noooooo!”. At which point he would promptly open his mouth and release the dreaded creature to chase me. He must have come to see it at bonding game where we took down the prey together.

    I have always felt that there is something about looking directly at a moth like attracts it your face. At least, that has always been my experience, so choose to attack with eyes averted and a long broom.

    Many years later in a different state, free of Hawk moths, I trained a cat ( a different one) to kill moths for me. Because I was too scared to do it myself. When a huge fluttering, dusty moth would suddenly make an appearance in the house -flying for my face of course- I would employ the following method.

    1. Avert eyes.
    2. Place small shaded table lamp on the floor (turned on)
    3. Turn off the overhead lights in the room
    4. Direct cat to main attraction.
    5. Watch from the sidelines and cheer cat on as they take down the dreaded predator.
    6. Use positive reinforcement and treats afterwards to train the cat to seek and destroy all moths before they find you.

  2. Tina says: Reply

    I too have a fear of moths, and when I reveal it to people (which I try not to, unless I run out of a room seemingly inexplicably because of a bleeding moth entering said room) they pretty much mock me. Thankfully my partner is understanding enough to be brave for the both of us. And reading your blog post has given me a bit of relief that I am not crazy about having this fear (although the thought that you had to spend time in a place while knowing that those hummingbird moth-things are flying outside is terrible!).

    1. haha it’s funny, after writing this post, I’ve learned that there are a fair amount of people that have the same fear! So don’t feel alone :) They’re awful, creepy, horrible little buggers!

  3. Ceri says: Reply

    OMG, my brother has an irrational fear of moths too and I’m tempted to show him that picture but I’m not that cruel. 😉 Haha. Especially I have an irrational fear of woodlice (I don’t know what you guys call them in the states- you can google it coz I sure as hell won’t!)

    1. hahah are those roly-poly’s?! I’ve never heard them called “woodlice” but that’s what they look like! It’s so funny – after writing that post, so many people have told me that they’re also scared of moths or some other random insect most people aren’t bothered by.

  4. Kyle Craft says: Reply

    OMG, Kay, I died!

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